It’s May. So that means wedding season is well and truly upon us. When I was younger I had no idea that there was a ‘wedding’ season. It only becomes apparent in your mid-twenties, when everyone you’ve ever met decides to get married and you have to kiss goodbye to having a free weekend between May and late September. You’ll get through it, there’s just a few things you need to keep in mind to survive the most social of seasons:
First things first, the invitation might say something like: “we don’t expect you to buy a gift, however if you would like to we have a list.” Of course you have to buy a gift. Think about it, if they actually didn’t expect anyone to buy them a gift then why did they create an incredibly detailed and meticulously planned list. It pays to act quickly when using the gift list. If you don’t, all the moderately priced gifts will be gone and you’ll be left with the option of a £300 rice cooker or a £3 potato peeler. If you find yourself stuck in this predicament, I’d recommend going with a few of the cheaper options, bearing in mind the bride and groom know exactly how much everything costs.
Nowadays, wedding invitations often detail a rigid and unflinching dress code that must be adhered to. There’s nothing worse than opening a wedding invitation to see “DRESS CODE: GATSBY WEDDING” but there’s really nothing you can do about it. You’ll just have to grin and bear it. It’s better to just make the smallest amount of effort possible than be the party pooper. If you’re fortunate enough to get a normal dress code, just remember formal doesn’t mean you have to wear a tux, and you still have to make a bit of an effort for a ‘casual wedding’.
If you’re not part of the wedding party, there’s a high chance that you’ll end up sat on a table towards the back of the room, with the bride’s mum’s recently divorced mate Jan, and the groom’s creepy work colleague. Every other table will seem like they’re having the time of their lives, laughing and joking while you’re stuck talking to someone about inner-city house prices. As far as I’m aware no one has ever got away with secretly altering the table plan, so your place setting is your destiny. Hopefully the speeches won’t go on for too long. So settle in, crack open the Merlot, tell everyone how you know the bride and groom, and you’ll be doing the YMCA on the dance floor in no time.